BEX EXPLAINS WHAT YOU ARE
Written by Jim O’Connoll
Bex wrote “What You Are” while battling a personal struggle with confidence. She was trying to produce the follow-up to her debut club track, “Life of the Party”; a song that climbed the Billboard club charts and rocked gay dance floors across the nation last summer. It did so well, Bex became a victim of her own success. She wanted her next track to be even better than the first, yet wasn’t sure she could accomplish it. She focused so much on the end result; she became crippled on how to begin.
Then a friend, noticing Bex’s conflict, off-handedly mentioned how striving for perfection is “just so boring”. Bex found it funny and painfully true. She wrote her friend’s thoughts down and then began drafting lyrics about how being put on a pedestal from her debut track felt phony. From there, “What You Are” was born. It releases to radio and dance floors this month.
While writing your new track, did you discover who you are, Bex?
I learned I’m just a New York girl with a mind that won’t quiet and a body that spontaneously dances.
What do you love most about being Bex?
I love that question. We spend so much time criticizing each other and dwelling on the negative; it’s good to consider what you actually like about yourself. So, let’s see… I love that I’m creative and imaginative.
As a club artist, are you expected to fit a certain mold?
Definitely. There are times I wish I were taller. Those tall girls get to wear really chic, fashionable clothes that look dumb on me. Sadly, though, I’m not gonna grow anymore, so it is what it is. At the end of the day, my looks shouldn’t matter. What matters is that my music makes people dance.
How do you deal with the pressures of the spotlight?
I live for it! Truthfully, it is totally what feeds me. As much as I rehearse on my own time, once in front of an audience, something changes. I do things instinctively that I never would have come up with otherwise. I also find it important to appreciate life outside of the spotlight. I make sure I have time to do normal things like grocery shopping, watching trashy reality TV, spending time with family and friends. Living my life outside of my music makes me feel a part of a bigger picture.
What’s the meanest thing that has been written about you?
(Laughing) There’s been a lot! Believe it or not, someone posted on my video for “Life of the Party” that they hope everyone in the video dies! Clearly, they were not a fan.
How did you react to that?
I was really shocked because it was completely out of left field! So psychotic.
Do you read all of your comments?
I do end up seeing a lot of comments people write, and it is what it is. Not everyone’s gonna like you. Some people don’t like you and they haven’t even heard your music or watched a video. They are just out to hate. The initial shock of some of the more vicious comments does actually hurt, but eventually I’m able to find a way to laugh it off and come back to reality. All part of the fun of having a job where you put yourself out there!
Still, being a celebrity shouldn’t mean you have to be subjected to bullying.
The web can be mean but it can also be a platform for so much good, such as bringing major issues to the forefront and supporting charities.
What’s your message to gay fans struggling with their own idea of ‘what they are’?
I cannot begin to pretend to know what it’s like to struggle with sexuality. I do know what it’s like to feel different, and to feel like you don’t fit in. Truth is, I like feeling that way. I think we should all take pride in our own identities, and enjoy not being like the majority or not being what others expect us to be. Sticking with like-minded people is the way to go for us. I tell all my friends and fans to surround yourself with people who respect you for you.
Because being different is cool today, wouldn’t you agree?
Yes, if being different is “what you are”, then you are one of the lucky ones. The world is craving uniqueness today, so bring it!